Apparently I don't poo enough.
These are the wise words of my mother as we make our way around Tescos:
‘We need some more Linseeds, I’ve nearly run out. Laura, you should start eating them actually, it would do you good’
‘Why, what do they do?’
‘They help you go to the toilet better.’
‘Sorry, what is wrong with my bowel movements mother?’
‘You spend hours on the toilet, there’s obviously a problem’
‘The only problem is that I can’t be bothered to move once I’m done. I don’t have any sort of bowel problems, I’m just lazy.’
God almighty. Smuggling my laptop into the toilet and watching family guy before, during and after my business is done is not illegal, is it?
